


Tearing at the Seams

by SpiralCreator



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sibling Rivalry, Step-parents, Step-siblings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 09:03:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12980700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpiralCreator/pseuds/SpiralCreator
Summary: Shizuo's new step-father, Shirou, is obsessed with perfection. Shizuo fails to meet such standards, but his step-brother, Izaya, is the quintessence of perfection.





	Tearing at the Seams

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BurningSwan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurningSwan/gifts).



“You’re beautiful, Izaya.”

Izaya Orihara was told that every day. That he was radiant, gorgeous, handsome, attractive, pulchritudinous… that he was perfect.

Shizuo Heiwajima was not. Their father never complimented him. Instead, Shizuo was told, “Learn to be beautiful, like Izaya.” 

Well, it was not as if he was Shizuo’s actual father. Shizuo was adopted by Izaya’s father, Shirou, after his mother died. They had been engaged. Shirou and Namiko, that is. But after Shizuo’s mother unexpectedly passed away, he had been forced to live with a man who knew very little about. That man and his son, the perfect Izaya Orihara.

Shizuo missed his mother very much, but he was not given that much time to mourn. Immediately after her passing, he had been forced to take up lessons so that he could ‘learn to be beautiful’. Painting, sculpting, modeling, piano, dancing, science, mathematics, English, sketching, acting—the list was endless. 

He and Izaya were also to stick to a very strict routine. They woke up at a certain hour, ate meals at a certain hour, exercised at a certain hour, and went to bed at a certain hour.

Shizuo would complain, but was well-aware that not many individuals had access to all of the amenities he was given. The food he was served was tasteful and healthy, his new bedroom was five times the size of his old house, and the education he received was top-notch. His life may have even been pleasant were it not for the arrogant brat that never failed to ridicule him.

_“You call that a painting? Why, it looks like you vomited on that canvas, haha! Was it meant to be a self-portrait? If so, then I must admit that it is accurate!”_

_“Stop destroying the sculptures, Shizu-chan. Don’t waste the good materials. Ah, that piece of stone looks like you just went outside and picked up a random rock. And what an ugly rock it was!”_

_“Shizu-chan, it looks like you ate something unpleasant. How am I meant to paint if my model is frowning? Oh, well. I suppose I shall have to make up what model lacks with my painting skill.”_

_“I’m pretty sure music is supposed to sound nice, Shizu-chan. Well, this is what one gets when one asks a beast to touch a delicate instrument.”_

_“Terrible dancing, Shizu-chan. You have about the same elegance as a giraffe—a blind, three-legged giraffe that fell on its head when it was born.”_

_“Ahahaha! You didn’t — ahaha — know that the sun is — hahaha — a star! What a colossal idiot!”_

_“I would give you points for trying, but you somehow made this worse. The same as ever, I suppose.”_

_“I’m impressed. I couldn’t be that stupid if I tried.”_

_“Pfft. Ahaha! Ahahaha! Ahahahahahaha!!”_

_“What a failure you are. Tsk, tsk. Such a disappointment.”_

The worst part of it all was: Izaya was right. Shizuo was subpar at every task he tried to complete. Izaya constantly rubbing it in made it worse, however. Shizuo loathed that obnoxious bastard and his poisonous words. Izaya was perfect in every aspect, so why did he feel the need to make derisive commentary? Shizuo would tell Izaya that blowing out someone else’s candle does not make his shine more brightly, but he could never seem to get through to the other. What would be the point, anyway? 

Izaya would always be the favorite child; Shizuo would always be the failure. Izaya would always be better at everything; Shizuo would always need improvement. Izaya would always be perfect; Shizuo would always be the mistake.

* * *

“How many times do I have to tell you to stop frowning? I don’t want to always have to paint such an expression.” Izaya held the paintbrush delicately, expertly twirling it a couple of times while waiting for Shizuo to alter his unpleasant countenance. 

“Why don’t you just paint a bowl of fruit instead?” Shizuo inquired, because it made sense. He did not want to model for Izaya and Izaya did not want to paint him. Why did the adolescent have to make everything so difficult? It seemed as if the only joy he received was from making Shizuo miserable.

Izaya peeked from behind his wooden canvas stand, sending Shizuo a glare. With an exaggerated sigh, his facial expression lightened up and he offered a forced smile while responding, “Because you need to work on modeling. Well, you need to work on everything, but modeling especially. So why not give a smile to your brother, hmm?” 

“You’re not my brother,” Shizuo retorted immediately. With that, he rose from the stool he was previously seated at and made his way to the pantry conveniently located in the corner of the art room. After looking at the snack options, he eventually decided on a bag of chocolate chip cookies.

“You could at least wash your hands first,” Izaya commented with a hint of disgust. In response, Shizuo simply shrugged and shoved another cookie into his mouth. His hands were not dirty; Izaya was simply a germ freak. Honestly, who carried hand-sanitizer on them at all times? “You have no class,” Izaya added when Shizuo failed to stop eating the cookies. _Yeah, so you tell me every day._ Shizuo shook his head and continued to snack on the flat sweet cakes. “You’re impossible.” _Right back atcha._

When Shizuo finally finished the bag of cookies, he was met with what appeared to be an agitated Izaya. The black-haired male had one hand on his hip while the other hand was rubbing his temple in an attempt to alleviate a headache.

“I hope you enjoyed your break.” Izaya was gripping onto the paintbrush tightly, eager to begin painting again, but he could not do so unless his model was once again seated on the stool.

“Yeah, the cookies were good,” Shizuo responded uncaringly. The blonde supposed he ought to fulfill his part now. He turned around and made his way back to the stool, ready to finally be a model.

“Models aren’t supposed to take breaks,” Izaya called out after him. Shizuo did not respond for he did not care. Izaya clicked his tongue in annoyance before letting out a chuckle. That startled Shizuo slightly for whenever Izaya laughed, that meant something unpleasant was about to occur. “I think I would like to paint my model in a more _eccentric _outfit.”__

* * *

After a tiring two hours, Shizuo was finally able to take off the dress he had been forced to wear. He had practically torn off the purple atrocity, burying it deep within the walk-in closet so that it would never be found again. As he was about to exit, he heard an irritating voice call out to him.

“Hurry up, Shizu-chan, or you’ll be late to dinner.” Shizuo checked his watch quickly; he had one minute to get to the table. _Dammit._ He could not afford to be late again, so he forwent his formal dining clothes and rushed out of the closet.

Shizuo’s appearance may have been haphazard, but at least he was punctual. Unfortunately, his step-father did not take his punctuality into consideration.

“Why aren’t you dressed properly?” Shizuo was about to respond, but was silenced by his step-father’s hand being raised. “I don’t want to hear any excuses. Next time, make sure to show up with the proper attire.” _Here it comes…_ “Just look at Izaya. He showed up on time and dressed accordingly. Isn’t he perfect?” Shizuo kept his gaze on the table, not needing to look at Izaya to know that he was beaming.

“I’ll make sure to be wearing the right clothes next time,” Shizuo settled on responding. Shirou made a noise of approval before beginning to dine. Izaya did the same. Shizuo would begin eating as well, but he had lost his appetite.

* * *

Izaya yawned as obnoxiously as he did everything else. After retracting his arms from their over-exaggeratedly stretched position, he turned to Shizuo and grinned. “Wasn’t dinner great today?”

“Shut up, Izaya. I want to go to bed already.” Shizuo entered the room, immediately making his way to his large bed. How unfortunate Shizuo was to be sharing a room with the bane of his existence. Originally, he did have his own room, but for the sake of ‘learning to be beautiful’, his step-father decided it would be best if he spent more time with Izaya. Luckily, there was a foldable divider between their beds, two sinks in the bathroom, and a great deal of space in the room, so he did not have to come into contact with Izaya more than what was necessary. Unluckily, Izaya enjoyed encroaching on Shizuo’s personal space.

“How cruel. Tell me, are you envious that I sit on the right side of the table? That father compliments me more?” _Ignore him and maybe he’ll go away._ Shizuo extended the grey divider between the two beds, hoping Izaya would get the message. Unfortunately, Izaya did not seem to care. The flea pushed past the divider and jumped on Shizuo’s bed. Not knowing what else to do, Shizuo placed a pillow on his face and continued to ignore the other. “Are you jealous because I’m perfect, Shizu-chan?”

As much as Shizuo wanted to kick Izaya off of his bed, he knew that his step-father would never forgive him if he harmed his ‘perfect son’. There was nothing else Shizuo could do but mutter what was both a plea and a threat. “Go away, flea.” Shizuo’s voice was muffled due to the pillow, but his words were clear enough.

“I think I’ll stay right here.” And so he did. Shizuo waited and waited before finally removing the pillow from his face. It had only been about twenty minutes and the flea had already fallen asleep. How arrogant he was to fall asleep on his enemy’s bed. Shizuo’s urge to throw him off was still extant, but he capitulated and allowed the other to remain asleep without disturbance.

Shizuo sighed and ran a hand through his hair. The other did not deserve to be so peaceful, but what could he do?

* * *

“Good morning, Shizu-chan!” That was the only warning Shizuo received before having cold water splashed onto his face. His body jolted at the sensation before a frown took over his features.

“I’m going to _kill_ you.” Shizuo’s expression was one of pure rage, but that only filled Izaya with delight. Izaya had already changed out of his black pajamas into his equally black casual attire. For someone who wore such somber clothing, how could he be this immature?

“You would threaten your own brother? I’m wounded.” Izaya placed a hand over the empty cavity in his chest in false offense. At the action, Shizuo gritted his teeth.

“I already told you that I’m not your goddamn brother!” Shizuo threw a pillow in the other’s direction, hitting his target with deadly accuracy. Consequently, Izaya fell over with a shriek.

* * *

_Hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate…_

“What are you thinking about, Shizu-chan?”

_Hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate…_

“You know, I wouldn’t be forcing you to carry my things if you hadn’t thrown that pillow at me.”

_Hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate…_

“Come on, no need to be so dour. I thought you liked piano lessons.”

_Hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate…_

“Must you be this way? You’ll never be beautiful if you continue to frown.”

Shizuo counted backwards from ten, slowly and while taking a deep breath. Izaya’s smug face was begging to have a fist connect with it, but Shizuo remained calm. As soon as the entered the music room, Shizuo and Izaya would be separated and he could play his piece in peace.

* * *

“Well, hurry up, Shizu-chan. We don’t have all day.” Izaya’s grin was ever-present, stretching from ear to ear. They were supposed to play in different rooms, but the oh-so-kind Izaya had offered to listen to Shizuo and help as he saw fit. The instructor, touched by Izaya’s generosity, had allowed it. And here they were, Shizuo at the piano, Izaya sat on a stool next to him, and the instructor off on an errand which Izaya had requested.

Shizuo took yet another deep breath before positioning his hands over the keys. Perhaps if he did well, then Izaya would finally be silenced. With renewed conviction, his brows furrowed in concentration and he began playing. Key after key after key, determined not to mess up. After about ten minutes, his hand began cramping and he accidentally hit the wrong key—an action to which Izaya began stifling laughter. That horrible noise made Shizuo mess up once again. And again. And again. The laughter only continued the more Shizuo messed up and the more Shizuo messed up, the more laughter was heard. It was a terrible cycle that continued for the last five minutes of Shizuo’s piece. 

Shizuo let out a harsh exhale once he was done which prompted Izaya into laughing without shame. 

“Ahaha! I have never heard such an obstreperous rendition of Moonlight Sonata. The sound is meant to be relaxing, Shizu-chan. Not some angry key-smashing.” Izaya tilted his head to the side challengingly, waiting for Shizuo to retaliate.

“Why don’t you play it then?” Shizuo inquired frustratedly.

“Oh, goodness no. That’s much too simple for me.” Izaya stood from the stool and made his way to the piano bench, shooing Shizuo off of it. “Instead, I’ll play you Eine Kleine Nachtmusik.” Shizuo rose from the bench, crossing his arms. Of course the pest would have to show off. “I’m surprised that you managed not to break this piano. I think that’s an improvement,” Izaya commented while examining the instrument with false amazement.

“Just shut up and play.” And so Izaya did. And he did so wonderfully. However, the beautiful music only felt like a slap to the face. It was more derisive than Izaya’s words. It served as a reminder that Shizuo would never be as coordinated nor as delicate as Izaya is.

* * *

“Hey, don’t you have your own bed?” Shizuo asked, knowing full-well that Izaya had his own bed, but for some reason wanted to rest in Shizuo’s. Again.

“Why would I need to use it? This bed is big enough for both of us and you don’t seem to have a problem with sharing. If you did, I would be kicked out already.” _I wish I could kick you out, you stupid flea._ Shizuo’s eyebrow twitched as he scooted away from Izaya.

“Stop testing your luck,” Shizuo cautioned. Izaya hummed in response before getting comfortable in the bed. After one of his over-exaggerated stretches, he turned over and sighed contentedly. 

“I don’t need luck, Shizu-chan. I’m perfect.”

* * *

Things had been rather peaceful today. For Shizuo, at least. Izaya had been in their father’s office the whole morning, so Shizuo was able to eat breakfast without any annoying interruptions. Shizuo did not know what Izaya had been doing nor did he want to know. Whatever reason for Izaya to be preoccupied was good enough reason for him.

* * *

It was noon by the time Shizuo heard footsteps. Since it was Sunday, Shizuo and Izaya were free from classes and could take a day to relax. Shizuo had chosen to spend his free day in their shared room, hoping Izaya would not return to said room. Unfortunately, the footsteps indicated that Izaya was on his way. Couldn’t he have just one day without arrogance personified?

As Shizuo heard the door to their room open, he groaned loudly, rising from his bed. Perhaps he could convince Izaya to leave him alone for just a couple more hours. As he made his way to the entrance, he expected to be met with a shit-eating grin, a derisive comment, and a confident gait. What he saw instead made his eyes widen.

Izaya appeared genuinely surprised to see him. Why would he return to the room if it was not to bother Shizuo? Izaya never took afternoon naps and everything he needed could be found outside of the bedroom. _So why is here?_ As Shizuo continued to mentally ask questions, he noticed how quiet it was. Izaya was not speaking. That in itself was enough cause for alarm, but that combined with the fact that Izaya was shaking slightly, made Shizuo feel a sense of dread.

“Izaya…?” Shizuo questioned cautiously. Izaya’s eyes began to water and he seemed fearful. But what could possibly frighten the perfect Izaya Orihara? It was too real to be some sort of prank, of this Shizuo was certain. “Are you oka—”

Shizuo was cut off by Izaya tackling him in some sort of hug. Shizuo wondered why Izaya would seek comfort in his enemy, but instead of asking for some sort of justification, he returned the embrace. He could feel Izaya’s shudders, his muffled sobs. It was a heart-wrenching sight and Shizuo did the only things he could. Sitting up, Shizuo brought Izaya closer and stroked his hair in a comforting manner. He kept Izaya in his lap as the other continued to cry. And he continued to cry for another twenty minutes. Even as those minutes passed, Shizuo continued to embrace his brother.

Once the sniffles had died down greatly, Shizuo raised a hand to Izaya’s cheek and pulled his face back to wipe off some of the tears with his thumb. “Do you… want to talk about it?”

“ _No_ ,” Izaya choked out while shaking his head vehemently, refusing to make eye contact. This startled Shizuo even more, but he did not question further. If Izaya did not want to talk about it, Shizuo would not force him. Clearly, whatever had happened impacted Izaya greatly.

Izaya was perfect — it was an axiomatic truth — so what could have startled him this much? To Shizuo, it did not matter. The only thing that mattered to him at that moment was making sure Izaya was okay.

* * *

And so Shizuo spent the rest of the day with Izaya, going about their usual activities. The only difference was: Izaya did not utter a single word. This change, though often wished for, made Shizuo more uncomfortable than any of the derisory comments Izaya had ever made.


End file.
